Just find the air intakes and get creative
How much glitter can a HEPA filter hold?
Enough to be faaaaaaaaabulous!!!
How much surmstrong can it block?
Heh, are you trying to say Surströmming?
yes
Expanding spray foam insulation oughta do the trick
Fart spray then foam.
Devious. It’s perfect.
What’s your favorite idea?
Mine is being creative.
Green is not a creative colour.
OMG flashbacks to those skits
Once we liberate the animals from the factory farms we load up dump trucks filled with manure and bury them alive in it. Asphyxiate on the fumes of a few tons of chicken shit or drown in it, idc.
I like this one.
Just cover critical areas in a literal metric ton of shit.
… Also, if they’re using thermal cameras, random mountains of shit popping up could actually work as a kind of concealment, or confuse them.
Fart
this guy stink bombs
That’s funny, but I can’t imagine someone spending all that money on a bunker without a positive air pressure system thats intake has NBC filters, solvent filters, etc. It’d be like shelling out thousands building a gaming rig with a 480i, monochrome, CRT monitor.
You can’t imagine someone like Elon musk or Donald Trump getting a critical feature wrong ?
I can’t imagine either one of them doing something as productive as setting one brick on top of another, much less designing and building a bunker.
Hi
Oh shit we’re doomed
- my dad when I was born
Well, the problem will be their perimeter security.
You’d essentially be treated as a VBIED, and lit the fuck up by assault rifles and/or swarms of suicide drones.
So… you could maybe attempt the ‘killdozer’ strategy…
Or, you could try low visibilty / high mobility.
Motorcycle, fuck maybe even an E-Bike, and hand made thermite charges.
Shitty thermite is really not that hard to make.
If you got through either AP Chem or a first year of Chem classes at Uni, and you can read the wikipedia page for thermite, you can probably figure it out. Also not that hard to figure out how to ignite it. Sparkle sparkle!
Just melt the air vents.
For further creativity, either wait for or stage nearby distractions.
And then have a very thorough plan to completely fucking vanish.
… you’d also have to, you know, gather all the required supplies for any plan, in a manner that does not raise anyone’s suspicions, and probably do some tests first.
That’s the nearly impossible part… you will almost certainly be unexpectedly meeting with Mr. FBI during that stage.
If they’re in bunkers the FBI isn’t helping. Society has collapsed. Cut utilities and destroy generators from afar. You can trebuchet tar balls, rocks, anfo, napalm, whatever to deal with remaining resistance. Or yeah killdozer, they’re unlikely to have anything more than .50BMG and construction equipment is fleet keyed.
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Every bunker has at least one secondary “escape” hatch" in case the primary entrance is obstructed - generally it’s buried and isolated/insulated from the thermal mass of the rest of the bunker so it doesn’t show up on IR, but a metal detector will work wonders for finding them.
So you need two cement trucks.
One cement truck, a metal detector, lawn chair, 12 gauge, and some beers oughta do it.
This guy
fuckshunts!Load the secret entrance to with booby traps all around it. Much more entertaining.
Or more for the big ones, assuming they didnt go the “massive hydraulic rams under a big rock” route.
You can also find them with ground penetrating radar since they tend to use sand as that insulating layer. From underneath they open a hatch and drain the sand out to clear the escape hatch. A big block of sand is plain and obvious to identify on a 250MHz system.
I’ll just use my Amazon basics ground penetrating radar then
Sounds like you have a suspicious amount of experience
I’m guessing utility location.
Every bunker will be built by people who won’t be invited to live in it. The locations of all exits, vents, water supplies, etc. won’t stay secret for very long.
That’s why you kill the workers in tragic accidents.
That’s where the bee truck comes in.
What’s this? A bunker full of billionaires unbothered by bees? My dump truck full of bees ought to put a stop to that!
Thanks, doctor bees!
Can also go the brute force route and overload the structure a lot of the time. Park a couple water tankers, a crane, whatever on top. They’re usually not made with the intention of supporting an extra 100tonnes
Why is everyone assuming the truck is actually filled with concrete? Mythbusters famously demonstrated they can be used to carry, and mix, a wide variety of products.
Like fertiliser contaminated with diesel, for example.
A cement truck full of cement is much easier to steal than a cement truck full of anything else.
A cement truck empty of cement would be marginally easier to steal than a cement truck full of cement…
The problem becomes filling that cement truck with anything else, though…
An empty one would be a lot easier to steal, they get filled, driven to site, and emptied. Filling one yourself would mean knowing how to operate the plant.
Getting the AN into it would be relatively easy, you just need to find a loader or telehandler.
Steal? Tell them your plan and you’ll have volunteers!
Because trapping them in is just as effective.
Less fun though.
I actually think it’s funnier to just trap them in.
Then it becomes Schrödinger’s billionaire.
Just set ANFOgetaboutit.
They’ll have to have ventilation, so dump as much liquid nitrogen down there as possible. It will convert to gas at a rate of 696:1, and fill every nook & cranny of the bunker with pure nitrogen gas, which will solve the problem within a few breaths.
THEN encase it in concrete, and leave it for some archeologist to discover in 10,000 years.
The tombs of the wealthy will be raided a pillaged like the tombs of the pharaohs.
And like the pharaohs, these assholes really think they’re gods.
Why? All the money is 1’s and 0’s on the computer. I’d not like they physically have a billion dollars in printed stocks.
No, the bunkers are for a post-digital world. Digital money will have evaporated. Those bunkers will be filled with gold bars, precious gems, and art. Also useful barter items.
Also weapons and ammo.
You can’t eat gold and gems. In all honesty we need to retire most jewelry and use the stuff industrially.
It’s more likely to be the mercenaries that already killed said billionaire and now control the compound.
Be careful might want to killdozer-up the cement truck first.
Finally a vault that Bethesda didn’t think of.
A vault full of gollums, sealed in with concrete.
Aside from being sealed by concrete and not the vault door, that pretty much is like half the vault experiments. I would even include the Gary clone vault as one. Those clones were fairly gollum like.
Just load it up with angry wasps and bullet ants before you seal it up.
If they are hiding in their bunkers because of an ecological disaster then we’re all screwed. If they are hiding in their bunkers from us…then we’ll get 'em eventually.
Use sewage trucks, come on did we learn nothing from Saints’ Row?
This is the way.
I say TWO cement trucks, just to be sure. We have nothing better to do.
would that be THIEL tyring to flee to argentina. I read NEW Zealand blocked his bunker construction, thats why hes going to argentina instead.
As is tradition.
I’m in. When are we doing this?
Bros been waiting for this! 😭
You may want to hold your breath Zuck.
They aren’t sitting in their bunkers because they don’t need to. People have still too much to lose to try making the concept of consequences real for billionaires.
Yes, but the point is that scaring them now with this idea of the future may help prevent it.
They think their bunkers will be safe in X years and lots of people are going to ensure they aren’t
Here is the thing about bunkers. Unless they have installed some way to power that bunker and provide water and food that cannot be destroyed, it’s a self-made trap. They can be ignored and the denizens will die in the cold damp darkness of starvation and dehydration. With a probable side dose of madeness.
Concrete
Nah we are going to get the water and aggregates closer to the bunker
