I look forward to the day when I pass my screen name on to my son…

It’s like something you’d expect to see out of Saw…

I want to play a game…

No really…

And above all that “CURSE YOU, BAYLE!!!”

That’s not really a shitpost. That’s fucking good!

Reminds me of a stinger for Adult Swim or something from the early days of MTV animation or the art style Liquid Death uses.

Step outside into the heat and your sweat will instantly steam them out. Thanks global warming!

“Dry-cleaners hate this one millenial secret!”

And, to this day, I still crave that super thin wedge of pizza once in a while.

So that’s how you get into porn…

RLS woke me up at 6am… I feel oddly well rested. Does that count?

Tylenol, acetaminophen in the US.

It’s paracetamol everywhere else.

Same, I have to use a VPN every night at work because Comcast doesn’t allow Parsec on their public wifi. Haven’t had an issue in the years I’ve been doing it.

Guessing either the VPN is shady or the IP was already banned from other people doing bad stuff. That I do have happen once in a while with Google, “We’ve detected malicious traffic on this IP address, blah blah blah.”

Somehow the dog always knows…

The torch has been passed…

Just use a muffin pan, people! Then you’ve got 12 personal brownies that are all edge.

There’s so many that totally need to come back…

I’m a big fan of Roosevelt’s “mind that functions at six guinnea pig power” and “fragrant man swine.”

Sites like that saved me thousands getting my psych degree. God bless professors like this. Also the ones who were like, “the new edition of the book you need for this semester is $500, but you can get the previous edition for $5 at this site. Here’s copies of the pages that were changed.” or “I photocopied every page you need for this semester from the book for all of you.”

I’ll take the shoebox(full of perfect diamonds, thanks xkcd!) and just for fun, the almost 10k calories of cheese for added wealth, opulence, and because I really love cheese. Some cheeses are worth hundreds of dollars a pound.

From a quick Google search, I saw a guy managed to fit 7,400 dollar bills into a shoebox. $10,000 bills are no longer printed but still valid, legal currency. Assuming that’s the max. That’s $74,000,000. You could dupe the box and net $148 mil.

However, thinking bigger. Go with a shoebox full of perfect diamonds. The value could conceivably be in the billions.