Adopt it

I’m the oldest millennial and the kid was older than me in the commercial

It used to be called Sunny Delight, and it was in a commercial someone Gen-Xified the script by having a kid exclaim “Sweet! Sunny D!” after rummaging through the other drinks.

God only knows what this stuff is. Probably some Soviet Union time travel scam from Dimension X.

Yeah the metal interferes with the taste.

I like Zimas and Smirnoff Ice but those always come in glass. I bet they’d be weird in a can.

Hey hey! Banana man!

Well, not all of those combinations are playable

R

— Shel Silverstein

The traffic light simply would not turn green
So the people stopped to wait
As the traffic rolled and the wind blew cold
And the hour grew dark and late

Zoom-varoom, trucks, trailers,
Bikes and limousines,
Clatterin’ by — me oh my!
Won’t that light turn green?

But the days turned weeks, and the weeks turned months
And there on the corner they stood,
Twiddlin’ their thumbs till the changin’ comes
The way good people should.

And if you walk by that corner now,
You may think it’s rather strange
To see them there as they hopefully gaze
With the very same smile on their very same face
As they patiently stand in the very same place
And wait for the light to change.

I know that guy

Bonko me $20 and I’ll send you some

This boat that we just built is just fine –
And don’t try to tell us it’s not.
The sides and the back are divine –
It’s the bottom I guess we forgot. . . .

– Shel Silverstein

This is such a good meme format

They named it after gazelle, which is a herd prey animal. That causes it to slip away from attention when it’s mentioned.

If they’d called in Bonko or something it would stand out in people’s memories more. Bonko, bright orange icon, it would spread by wildfire. Nobody would forget that name.

There are no hard consonants in the word. Synaesthetically, it’s a blue-purple word. Cool, muted. It’s a word that, even before the “gazelle” reference, is hiding there. Your mind slips over it without friction. It enters and leaves your mouth and your mind like a fish passing under the sparkling water, nearly unnoticed.

Terrible brand name. I mean, it does convey a little more safety than “Bonko” but the whole point with the unsafe sounding name is it causes the person to consciously ask “How safe is it?” and if you can answer that immediately with “Safer than Ft Knox” then it becomes part of the brand consciously.

Zelle is non-threatening, but that’s not the same thing as safe when it comes to business or finances.

What’s a good safe, energetic, competent, orange word for this service? Hmm. Bonus points if it’s intuitively self-descriptive.

How about “Paytag”. It’s yellow but whatever. Still might not be better than Bonko.

I got locked out of paypal for no reason I could discern from like 2007 to 2015. Can’t remember the exact dates but for years it was “I can’t use paypal any more because my account broke” and then finally after years if that one day it was “oh shit it work look at that”.

90 time

If you can’t be in a library without jerking off in the shared spade, you have to go outside.

“I hate seeing homeless people trying to cope with being homeless”

This is called a number of things:

• putting words in someone’s mouth
• mis-using quotation marks
• a straw man

He didn’t say that. He said he hates to see homeless people in there jerking off and doing drugs.

Respond to that. Don’t respond to something else that so heavily distorts what the other guy said. There’s no point, other than to sacrifice anything valuable the conversation could have been into being a play about how morally superior you are.

Ugh.

There is no system under which nobody will be homeless, unless some people are kept inside by force. We can reduce homelessness, but if we don’t stop until there is ZERO then we will have gone far into the realm of cutting people’s rights down so much they can’t screw their own lives up.

I hate that this is true, but we don’t benefit from pretending (or legitimately believing) that it isn’t.

In order to have a world where people can determine their own destiny, ie in order to have a world with freedom, we must allow people to destroy themselves.

The system is badly rigged and unfair, but even the perfect system will still have some homeless people.

I don’t think the words “jerking off or doing drugs” were accidental in that comment. The request isn’t to ban homeless people from being in the library respectfully.

A rule like “no large backpacks” is bullshit, and anti-homeless. Backpacks aren’t a disruption to the library.

A rule like “no jerking off or doing drugs” is perfectly reasonable.