So yesterday, they just phoned it in.

Him: “Darling, your eyes sparkle like stars in the cosmos! My love for you is eternal!”

Her: “Nngh!” ptttttthhhhhhhht PLOP

Unsurprised Musk is in there.

Which of Trump’s closeted mob was this?

Hmm. In Australia, there’s 11 and a half.

They don’t use it enough in the movies.

Fry your flour in butter.

Even better, butter the outside too and fry the toast in it. Melts in your mouth! Makes a lot of smoke in the kitchen, but melts in your mouth.

Took a minute to understand the ‘m’ means ‘miles’ not meters.

Nope. Chuck Testa!

Well, that sounds wonderful!

If we’re living in a simulation, can’t we just use clouds as RAM?

Or waiting for a tradie to turn up ‘some time between 7 and 5’.

That woman with the enormous hair has dozens of records in there.

Wow! I hope your neighbour’s wife isn’t home when he’s away, what, with a monster like that in the house. She’d be fucked!

That’s … uh … that’s one hell of a LED. Who installed it? From where was this colossal diode purchased? Just, y’know, given the sun has 99.99% of the mass in the solar system, it would’ve taken quite the team. Ask him if it was illegal immigrants, ‘terking the jerb’ of galactic stupidity away from him and his peer group!

“I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered!”

I’ll Dick your York … !

I’m wondering what would keep the part in the atmosphere from building up a massive electrostatic charge.

They need to have a swarm of dollar signs being sucked into that megachurch.