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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • My siblings and I were raised by an abusive narcissist who spent most of her free time screaming at my dad, when she wasn’t emotionally abusing and neglecting us.

    But of course the cultural narrative was that men are only and always abusers, and women are only and always abused - so we normalised it; our whole reality bent around the notion that she was the poor innocent beleagured victim just doing her best to survive.

    We took a vast amount of damage because an interpretation where she was the abuser simply wasn’t available to us - instead of forming defenses against her, we rendered ourselves more vulnerable.

    I don’t take kindly to being told to go fix women’s problems first before mine will matter.





  • oh ffs, don’t be pedantic. It provides a desktop environment, if you select one - we use xfce as best of the bunch.

    My point isn’t the window manager, it’s the whole ecosystem. It’s the million little hidden folders clogging up your home directory, it’s the haphazard set of default graphical apps that get installed, it’s having to fuck around to get dbus running by default for the handful of applications that silently timeout and die without it, it’s having to delete lockfiles for users after a crash, it’s the general production values of a 90s shareware cdrom.

    Just imagine trying to get general admin staff set up with that, and trying to support them - It’d be as horrible and painful as trying to set up developers or your network infrastructure under windows.

    And at the end of the day, 90% of the things you need your desktop environment for are admin-staff kinds of tasks. Poking around on the web, mail, media, printing (and of course video games), which are just better and easier without the all propeller-hat shit.


  • Yes, linux is terrible on the desktop.

    I’ve worked in a Linux shop for the last 20 years, we provide a desktop-linux environment (latest debian) for thousands of users, and even with dedicated professionals managing it, the UX is just hilariously terrible by modern standards, right across the board.

    My god that’s the perfect metaphor: it’s the desktop-experience version of PHP. No one thing is particularly broken in and of itself, but the set of all of them together… SMH.

    I refuse to deal with it on a daily basis for file-print-web-email stuff; I use a Windows box as my desktop machine, and just SSH or VNC into the backend for the actual sysadmin part of my job. OSX is usable too, but I just don’t like it.

    To be absolutely clear: Linux is the only sane choice for backend services or development; no normal person would willingly subject themselves to Windows for either of those purposes. But for the box you physically plug your mouse into, using linux is sheer masochism.






  • To be clear, there’s nothing wrong with using female as an adjective.

    Calling someone a female customer / politician / patient / etc is perfectly fine and normal.

    The problem comes when you use it as a noun.

    Think of calling someone “a gay”, “a black” or “a Chinese”.

    You just don’t use adjectives-as-nouns to refer to people, apart from a very limited set of exceptions.

    Instead you talk about a gay, black or Chinese person.

    The same goes for ‘female’.

    And since there’s already a word for ‘female person’ - ie. ‘woman’ - then going out of your way to avoid it makes you sound like a raging incel.




  • Even this reponse needs rephrasing all to hell. Come on. Are you telling me I can’t use the word meaning the main part of an article? The part between your neck and your legs, the HTML element where the visible part of the page goes. Mustn’t say it. Seriously. What a freaking clown show.

    1: nope. It’s repeatable and predictable, instant nope page or success, depending on content.

    2: Nope. I managed to post this here, but only after removing certain words about being mean, rhyming with violets and calm.

    3: I don’t doubt it, but unless the software is running on Eddie from HHGTTG, I don’t see how mentioning the topics could contribute to issues.

    4: Nope, this very item was getting noped, and the post wasn’t responding to an individual.

    5: nope, see points 1 and 4.




  • Yep, and they need to be reactive, in-context - not a cold setup.

    It’s about trolling your kid, tripping up their train of thought.

    Puns are an approach - but it’s not the pun itself, it’s a:) finding a relevant one in realtime and b:) the facepalminess of actually doing so, here, in the middle of an ostensibly serious conversation, then standing around pulling this face.

    But more common and usually more effective are unjokes, context switches and category errors.

    Q: What has five toes but isn’t your foot?

    A: My foot.

    “Wait, so is this your street here?”

    “Nah, it belongs to the council.”