Let’s cut all the philosophical crap and focus on what is most important here.

Would you still love me, now that I’m a worm?

That means we get a share in the profits, right? Right?

Pirate SadHam Hussein:

But you have heard of me.

Me loading up A Link to the Past and still having a full memory of every palace, which areas are secrets, which walls make the satisfying clink clink clink, and how to get the Golden Master Sword without having to check GameFAQs:

“Hell yeah. Zelda, go put on your green tunic and let’s go save Link.

I got you, boo. 😘

The simpler times for sure. Who are these handsome young men? I love the smiles on their faces. It looks like they’re up to no good, the little rascals! 😇

Popeyes Spicy Chicken Chernobyl Elephant Foot Sandwich

They are if you get the organic kinds at the farmer’s market like I do

Briefcase cased, so SyncThing could sync.

In my first briefcase I stored my MS Paint drawings. I got a new job and bought a bigger briefcase, and now I put my Linux isos in there.

Yep. The Chad Billdozer making so much sense here, I tell you hwhat.

Did you know that Viggo Mortensen broke his cement?

He can talk! He can talk! He can talk!

Troy McClure:

I can siiiiiing!

Years ago we learned useful Microsoft keyboard shortcuts to save time, and passed those around the school yard.

Now we’re learningMicrosoft advertisement/predatory privacy-invasive bypass shortcuts and passing it around the school yard.

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/john-silver-explaining-to-anna-jay

If Ash Ketchum can brave a thunderstorm to save Pikachu while being chased by murderous Spearow, and can tank a well-timed lightning strike without dying, your lazy ass better get outside, catch some Pokes, and hatch some Eggs.

Tick-tock, Trainer. I thought you wanted to be the very best!

I bought one of these masks for the novelty, as well as the influence to buy it during the Great Lockdown when not much was known about Covid and we were wiping down our groceries. By the time the product launched, we already knew how Covid spread and had a vaccine. Despite the advertising saying that it has N95 filters, it was clear that this was not an N95 product. Razer generically stated that it is not a certified N95 mask, but the advertising and product pages were certainly misleading and the FTC’s fine is valid and justified to protect the health and safety of consumers. I would not have used the Zephyr in place of my actual certified N95 masks.

The Zephyr was heavy, but overall quite comfortable, but I never took it outside and wore it for something like a grocery trip (since I knew it was not an N95 mask, and masks were very divisive where I live in a Red State. The last thing I wanted was to potentially be attacked by an anti-vax/mask Freedom Lover). It was heavy, and the fans were loud - very loud. What was disappointing was that the production version did not come with the two features I wanted that were initially advertised: the sanitising case, and the voice amplifier. Imagine how much more fines Razer would face if they advertised an included UV case that came with blue lights rather than UV lights!

I didn’t end up keeping the Zephyr, although I wish I did just to keep a small, unique memory of an uncertain and dangerous time. I do wonder if they could have launched this product sooner and certified it as an N95 mask, if gaming culture could make wearing masks when you’re sick popular. Selfish people might put aside their “freedoms” if they could look cool with gamer RGB and get attention from others (the motivation for selfishness). Of course the Zephyr would need to go through several years of revisions until it became culture.

Load Balancers everywhere named Samwise: “You mean we don’t have to share the load?”

Wild Tobey appeared: “I’m gonna put some pop in your eyes.”

Hi, this is Hewlett Packard here. We read your post and are happy you love our products! Wouldn’t it make sense for you to upgrade to one of our newer models? I’m sure you’re tired of lugging your heavy, old printer these days.

Our new ones are much lighter! Lighter in weight due to beautiful design! Lighter even on your wallet (at first, and for now)!

Won’t you consider upgrading and locking in - I mean - “purchasing” a new printer, pretty please? uwu :3

Here’s a friendly Kirby to convince you to upgrade! See, we’re cool and we know how to use product placement! Upgrade now or else!! We can’t wait for YOUR SOUL TO BE OURS.

Your Friend, HP

(We rebranded. Now the “P” stands for Predatory, but like the cute kind 😘. It’s okay to give us your money, trust us.)