One time I was in line to piss before watching a Mastodon concert, and I really had to piss, and I stood in line with like 50 dudes waiting for ye olde washroom, and there was like two urinals and a stall. Well fuck me the stall was taken, so not wanting to be a rude dick to every other dude in line I tried to use the urinal. So I whipped out mah johnson, and it was pretty much like the comic, got pee shy, held it for like 30 I don’t know 45 seconds or something. Nothing. I’m like looking over my shoulder at this massive line of of dudes behind me. Fuck. So I just pretended to shake it, shoved it back into my pants and was miserable having to piss the whole Mastodon set.

I fucking hate having to piss in public around people. It’s so terrible.

Uh, Relevant username? (My DMs are open lol)

What the actual fuck?..

I thought I invented this or something, now I have to reconsider my entire life… I literally used to do this at work in a single stall bathroom but you never know when you might come out and there might be a line of even one person let alone four or five and they’re like what the hell you doing in there buddy. But seriously some psychological stuff like that can get you over the hump sometimes. It’s really something to consider if you are having problems. I’d prefer to sit down all together, I do all the time at home, but public restrooms, yeah, not unless it’s an emergency in the other department.

Now though, it’s mostly prostate and bladder issues at 43, but hey, if that’s the worst of my problems I guess hell, It could be worse. I mean it’s not necessarily the least of my problems but hey, I guess if (trying) to piss standing up is what I’m up against, at least I’m still upright to try, right?

Fuck I don’t know where I was going with this but anyway yeah I guess I’m not the only one lol

🤷🏽

I thought we upgraded to nano plastics.

I mean, do the tshirt and sweatpants vibe together? Or at least with the carpet on my bedroom floor ;p

This is such a great thread and I’m really glad to be here for it. I hope to have, uh, interesting dreams when I finally fall out ;)

Someone call funhole lol

Bro I’m pretty sure it’s a gorilla my friend

This is totally my mood today

Best part of packing an apple bowl to carry with you was the ability to eat the evidence!

I thought Mormon tea contains plant based Ephedra? LSA is morning glory or Hawaiian baby wood rose seeds, iirc, no?

Cute Kitty collection you’ve got going on there, sorry for your loss about the roller lol

And for goodness sake, you could have at least marked your comment NSFW ;p My poor virgin eyes have never seen such beautifully pedicured toes! How will I ever go back? My expectations are now set far too high! I’m ruined!

Psst, what you doing after this comment? Want to meet up and play toe war? :p

There for a while. I was absolutely living on them at work and at home and getting in arguments about how long they could stay unrefrigerated after I’d pulled them out of my pocket after a day and still eat them, or eat one from my backpack that had been there for a couple days. I think just about 2 days ago I ate a whole package in like a couple hours. My cholesterol and sodium levels are probably fucked, but I’ll be damned if cheese sticks are not absolutely amazing. The sargentos full fat regular cheese sticks are the primo for me, but I’ll settle with the shitty dollar store ones if I have to. And no, I never string them :p but now I really freaking want some breaded ones and some marinara (or the comment in this thread about a restaurant that served the fried ones with applesauce sounds intriguing). But yeah, long-winded story short, I’d hang out with your friends lol sound like some good peoples :p

If you ask my orange cat Ginger, she would probably tell you ‘To shreds, you say?’ I think I’m up to three rolls now that I need to give some first aid to lol

This reminds me of that scene from the OG Clerks lol

Does currently sitting down to pee get any points here?